संसृति कुमारी ([info]zoeimogen) wrote,
@ 2009-03-20 10:02:00
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Current mood: calm

Miss/Mrs/Ms?
This seems to be creating quite a fuss - I'm not sure why though. I'm not going to get too wound up if some computer system only lets me choose Miss or Mrs, but labeling an initiative to get rid of it as "political correctness gone mad" seems a bit... patriarchal.




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[info]auntysarah
2009-03-20 10:24 am UTC (link)
"Political Correctness Gone Mad" seems to be the battle cry of those who behave as though bumbling through life being gratuitously offensive to other people for no apparent reason makes them some sort of loveable rogue.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]sebastienne
2009-03-20 10:34 am UTC (link)
This chap has it down pretty accurately, I can't help but think.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)


[info]auntysarah
2009-03-20 10:49 am UTC (link)
That is awesome! Thank you.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Fuck it, *founds Law*
[info]darkwaterfairy
2009-03-20 01:47 pm UTC (link)
I want to found 'Jessika's Law'!

Like how Godwin's Law it cited to declare a party has lost an argument when they compare something/one to the Nazi's, this one would be cited to declare a party has lost an argument when they call something "political correctness".

...because There. Is. No. Such. Fucking. Thing!!!!

PC is in essence a strawman concept, where the invoker either ignorantly or intentionally conflates some examples of equality, diversity, etc, with examples of poorly informed managers and staff making utter fail of attempting to follow instructions, policy, or trends in equality-&-diversity or health-and-safety. The purpose of such invokation I'm sure I don't need to go into here. E&D and H&S are not flawed or totalitarian, but shit implementation of them is just as shit as shit implementation of anything.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]jennyemily
2009-03-20 10:48 am UTC (link)
I insist on the title 'Miss' even though I am married. I can't stand 'Ms' because I don't feel I should be forced to take a made up title just because some American femminists assumed 30 years ago that all women thought like they did. I also don't like 'Mrs' because that smacks of broadcasting my marital status. I'm not single, but I'm proud to be a 'Miss'.

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[info]zoeimogen
2009-03-20 10:52 am UTC (link)
I tend to use Miss myself - even before I was divorced. Confuses people when I mention I have 3 kids though. (I don't think I fit some people's "single mother, never married" stereotype - they think Miss implies never married)

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]twiggy_j, 2009-03-20 01:37 pm UTC

[info]cyberspice
2009-03-20 01:19 pm UTC (link)
But you're young. A Miss at fourty something has some social stigma.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 02:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pungoose, 2009-03-20 07:55 pm UTC

[info]nunfetishist
2009-03-20 10:49 am UTC (link)
Why have any "title" at all? I never did understand what they're for. Except for people with doctorates to show off.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]zoeimogen
2009-03-20 10:50 am UTC (link)
Because calling someone by just their last name sounds a little like you're back at school? :-)

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]nunfetishist, 2009-03-20 10:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 11:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]pungoose, 2009-03-20 07:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 11:27 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]nunfetishist, 2009-03-20 11:40 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 12:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nunfetishist, 2009-03-20 12:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 12:24 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 12:28 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 12:29 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 12:33 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nunfetishist, 2009-03-20 12:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 12:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nunfetishist, 2009-03-20 01:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]alicephilippa, 2009-03-20 01:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nunfetishist, 2009-03-20 01:06 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 02:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]pungoose, 2009-03-20 08:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-21 11:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 11:14 am UTC

[info]blahflowers
2009-03-20 11:37 am UTC (link)
Well, it does seem as if it's only those people with a vested interest in or baffling like for the patriarchy that are complaining in that article.

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[info]cmcmck
2009-03-20 12:15 pm UTC (link)
As ever, my sect, the Quakers, seem to be ahead of the game- the tradition is simply to know people by their names and to address them in written form by their names. No titles.

What about this don't the politicos understand?

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[info]nunfetishist
2009-03-20 12:20 pm UTC (link)
Because, clearly, some people find others actually using their name dreadfully stressful. What's the name for if we don't use it?

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]auntysarah, 2009-03-20 12:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmcmck, 2009-03-20 01:01 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cyberspice, 2009-03-20 01:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmcmck, 2009-03-20 01:30 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_local_echo, 2009-03-20 02:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 02:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_local_echo, 2009-03-20 03:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmcmck, 2009-03-20 04:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]the_local_echo, 2009-03-20 04:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmcmck, 2009-03-20 05:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]zoeimogen, 2009-03-20 02:03 pm UTC

[info]pungoose
2009-03-20 08:05 pm UTC (link)
The politicos Gordon (nudge, wink) understands this perfectly.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]katsmeat
2009-03-20 12:27 pm UTC (link)
'Uproar in the British Press' usually means the Mail and Sun getting their knickers in a twist. It's not as if it matters much. The EU won't be changing back and it won't affect the larger social changes now making it the norm for married professional women to keep their names. I suspect in a few years time, Mrs will seem as peculiar and old-fashioned as a married woman losting their entire name and being referred to as 'Mrs John Smith'.

As somebody once said, tomorrow these words will be on the bottom of budgie cages, and getting the respect they deserve.

Though saying that, this nebulous thing called political correctness does go mad on occasion. I think the original intent was for a set of rough guidelines for use by the well-meaning, but thoughtless*, for avoiding gratuitous offence to people who've done nothing to them. And perhaps opening their eyes a little and making them a bit less thoughtless.

It goes mad when it's used just as a way of proclaiming the speaker's set of political beliefs - the linguistic equivalent of a Che Guevara T-shirt. And with a similar emphasis of display over genuine commitment.

* The category I'd file myself under

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[info]auntysarah
2009-03-20 12:30 pm UTC (link)
the linguistic equivalent of a Che Guevara T-shirt

*snerk*

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]cyberspice
2009-03-20 01:15 pm UTC (link)
I like being Ms Lewis. On the whole I find Mrs is a bit like you're now a chattle and Miss, as you get older, is a bit spinsterish.

(Reply to this)


[info]lisaquestions
2009-03-20 01:23 pm UTC (link)
"You can't impose liberation on people; it has to come from understanding.

Wait, what?

People can only have liberation when the majority approves?

"Tyranny of the majority?"

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]cmcmck
2009-03-20 01:38 pm UTC (link)
That's the one! People can only have liberation when Daily Mail (aka Daily Malice) readers approve, actually :o)

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]lisaquestions, 2009-03-20 01:46 pm UTC

[info]darkwaterfairy
2009-03-20 01:53 pm UTC (link)
I don't understand why the decision to "ban" usage of Mrs and Miss, but it does seem like a hell of a fuss over nothing. Would be more sensible to simply just say that you use Ms or Miss/Ms/Mrs when you don't know the title of the person you are corresponding to, and then use their preference from then on, or just look at dropping titles.

How the hell are the 'right wing' going to cope when we broach the matter of titles accounting for non-gender-binarous people?

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]cmcmck
2009-03-20 04:19 pm UTC (link)
By saying: 'this is political correctness gone mad'........

Sigh.......this is where we came in :o)

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]aliguine
2009-03-20 06:30 pm UTC (link)
Personally, I prefer 'Ms.' as why should I have to declare my marital status to anyone (I'm married, BTW).

Having said that, I get called "Miss" quite a bit, which tickles me especially that I'm getting on a bit now.

Oooh - conflict!!! Helllllp!!! :)

(Reply to this)


[info]beckyrachel
2009-03-20 09:42 pm UTC (link)
I use Miss, and despite being pre-divorce I never was Mrs.
I have just been buying car insurance, their quote systems would NOT let me be Miss and select Married for marital status ( whatever that is), there wasn't a separated option. There certainly wasn't a - Look I know I'm married but it IS MISS OK option.

(Reply to this)


[info]caradea
2009-03-21 08:28 am UTC (link)
I'd rather a law passed banning the word "ma'am" from casual conversation at supermarkets and the like. It makes me feel incredibly old at age 27 to be called ma'am for the last several years :(

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]zoeimogen
2009-03-21 11:25 am UTC (link)
Do people assume from your age that you're "Mrs"? They do for me, even if they don't know I have kids.

As a good lesbian feminist, I should be annoyed by the assumption that I'm straight and married. However, the usual female imperative takes over - I just get annoyed that they think I'm older!

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]pungoose, 2009-03-22 09:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]cmcmck, 2009-03-23 08:53 am UTC
no box for me
[info]carolinetoo
2009-04-21 10:18 am UTC (link)
Recently I have noticed more notices, when registering online for example, that declare that they have no interest in your gender then go on to offer the usual two options M or F, or Mr. Mrs.what is your favourite colour, black or white? Mine is RED.

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